Oct 13 2009
Religious Praise as Grooming at a Distance
Lord my God! When I in awesome wonder
Consider all the works thy hand hath made,
I see the stars, I hear the mighty thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed;Refrain:
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art!
Then sings my soul, my Saviour God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art! (56)
To please, placate and perhaps find favor from an alpha: groom him. But what are humans to do? We don’t finger through the fur of others. What fills this void in our social-behavior repertoire? Kissing ass, to use the colloquial term. Or, in other words, praise.
Much of the praising behavior humans engage in, however, is not directed up the hierarchical social structure (and very rarely is it directed down). Instead, we praise those of similar status with whom we have alliances. Or those we simply want to be “on friendly terms with,” keeping alive the possibility of a future working relationship, should we need it.
Don’t you look nice today! This type of human talk is the human equivalent of grooming. It helps to establish and maintain relationships.
Among primates, lip-smacking often precedes and/or accompanies grooming — as if signaling intention to pick off fleas with lips. Lip-smacking likely evolved into a purely auditory gesture of friendliness when emitted on its own. Emitting words while gum-flapping became a natural elaboration.
In terms of grooming, the difference between human apes and non-human apes is that humans using words to pleasurably stroke others, while non-human apes must position themselves closer and physically reach out.
Robin Dunbar, in his book, Grooming, Gossip, and the Evolution of Language, has made great headway into an understanding of that class of human behavior we might call “chit-chat.” He wrote, “We suggested that, as group sizes began to drift upwards from the numbers to which apes are currently limited, vocal grooming began increasing to supplement physical grooming.” (57)
Who has time to physically groom all the important and potentially important members of their social groups? Fortunately, we can do it across space. And with a few quick words.
Yes, it can be difficult to see the social intent behind the symbols we speak. It helps to envision what words mean in terms of behavior. For example, a “Yes, sir” voiced by recently disciplined son to his father is akin to a bow. Sir certainly doesn’t mean bow semantically. But there is a whole lot more to language than semantics. (58)
Consider the current fad of calling someone or his/her deed as “stupid.” It’s actually high praise. To say “that was stupid!” is to mean, “what you just did was awesome!” Words are highly plastic. One element to language that is not plastic, however, is tone. While one lover can coo to another, “you’re a babe,” or some such thing, and have it welcomed, I would advise against changing the emotional tone to an utterance and expecting it to be understood. “YOU’RE A BABE” spoken with in a dismissive sneer growl will never please a lover. Not among normal human animals.
In fact, voicing “Yes, sir” to a superior in a half-hearted tone may be met with an accusation of insubordination. So say it like you mean it.
In his book, Collision of Wills: How Ambiguity About Social Rank Breeds Conflict, Roger Gould noted,
“In complex organizations in the West, dominance is most often displayed by issuing spoken or written commands, deference by compliance with those commands, occasionally accompanied by salutes or phrases like ‘Yes, sir’ and followed if necessary by abject apology for failure to comply.” (59)
We human primate take social status serious, whether or not we are consciously aware of it. In a fairly recent research paper published in Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, social psychologists highlighted the element of vocal behavior that frequently escapes awareness. Their studies demonstrated that individuals are “largely unaware of the nonverbal patterns that occurred. Nonetheless, these behaviors affected their comfort and liking, even though they were unaware of this functional aspect of their behavior.” (60) Specifically, the research looked into the complimentarity of dominance & submissive signals. When one individual sent more dominant signals, the other “complimented” their partner in the temporary dyad by sending a relatively submissive signal.
“You should have seen me. I was da bomb.”
“Wow. I’m impressed.”
Turning to religion now, I contend that prayer and praise can be seen as the unconscious “spiritual grooming” of an invisible, imagined greater. How else is the most mighty of agents, the Almighty, to be pleased and placated? Sure, food offerings can fill a void. (The way to a god’s heart is through his stomach?) But the more ways to please a god, the better.
Be exalted, O LORD, in your strength; we will sing and praise your might. (Psalms 21:13)
Singing praise to the strength of the greater: how primate-like. Notice in the next verse the more rudimentary element that accompanies the praise -
All the earth bows down to you; they sing praise to you, (Psalms 66:4)
We send you both auditory and visual signals the we accept your greater status.
Ezra praised the LORD, the great God; and all the people lifted their hands and responded, “Amen! Amen!” Then they bowed down and worshiped the LORD with their faces to the ground. (Nehemiah 8:6)
Over many thousands of years the physical gestures of primates likely evolved into purely verbal ones. But we mustn’t lose sight of the tangible. In the least, vocal gestures matter because they influence us emotionally and socially. And those are tangible effects. They really do matter.
—
56) “How Great Thou Art” is a Christian hymn based on a Swedish poem written by Carl Gustav Boberg (1859–1940) in Sweden in 1885. (Wikipedia)
(57) Dunbar, R. Grooming, Gossip, and the Evolution of Language, Harvard University Press, Cambridge, MA, 1996, p. 115
(58) Interestingly, sir has its origins in sire, which means senior/elder as a noun, to beget as a verb. One responsible.
(59) Gould, R. V. Collision of Wills: How Ambiguity About Social Rank Breeds Conflict, University of Chicago, Chicago, 2003, p. 57
(60) Tiedens, L. & Fragile, A., “Power Moves: Complementarity in Dominant and Submissive Nonverbal Behavior,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, March 1, 2003, Vol. 84 #3
